Sunday, February 12, 2012

The fork in the road


At times one might find themselves at a point where they are at the proverbial “fork in the road”.  Sometimes you may find yourself at this point more than once in a lifetime and possibly for more than one reason, at work, with family or with your training.

I can say that I have found myself at this point many times in life and for different reasons, to go to college or not, to take this job or that one, to change careers totally or not, to move to a different city or not, and I am sure there are other instances I could recall. The fact of the matter is that many times I have stood at the fork in the road and had to choose which way to go. Sometimes you make a choice and everything works out and sometimes you make a choice and it was the wrong one, such is life, it is full of twists and turns, good and bad. The main thing I have found is that even though you may be on a journey, even if it turns out to be the wrong path, it always helps if you have someone to share the journey with.

In my training I have been to this point a few times, trying to decide between a sense of giri to my teacher or what was right for me. Unfortunately there are times when you choose to follow someone or join an association, only to find out that it was not the right choice for you. Sometimes these things happen, what the really hard part is, is having the courage to make that change when you know things just aren’t right.  As a student you should respect your Sensei and cherish the relationship that you have with him, but the same is also true for the Sensei, he must also treat the student with respect and kindness, while he maybe stern and his training hard, he should still treat you with common decency.

Now that I have rambled on, I will get to the reason I started this topic in the first place.  I have found myself at the fork in the road twice already this year, once at work, where I had to decide what I wanted, if I wanted to move up, stay where I was at, or leave and the second time was in my training.

Recently one of my teachers passed away, so I find myself standing at a point where I have to decide what to do next, where to go, who to follow. This is not a choice to be made lightly or overnight. I have to decide if I want to go to Okinawa again to seek a direction,  stay with the association or go with one of the many splinter groups. Perhaps after 35 years of training, it is time for me to just simply keep on keeping on, train in what I have been taught and be content with what I have been fortunate to learn, maybe I don’t need a teacher at this point, maybe I don’t need to line the pockets of someone else.  Then again, I am positive that there is still much to learn, so…
It seems that I have many things to consider and think about, I have been busy this past year, writing the blog, writing books, teaching, training and of course work and family, things have only intensified and become busier these past few months at work, with no sign of slowing down, so I think with my training I will focus on what I need and want, and enjoy the journey, time will tell what it is that I will do and where I might end up, but for now I am just going to train to train.